...about what is to come. You ever really feel like you don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, and it scares the hell out of you? This is how I feel about 90% of the time anymore, and it drives me absolutely nuts!!! I wish I just knew what would transpire in the next few weeks so I would not have to be so uptight!!! It's so funny, tests, quizzes, and challenging professors used to get me so worried, but anymore I really don't care too much about any of that. I finished out my final semester with all A's and a B+, ironically in my only Spanish class, the last one I needed to complete my major in the field;-) I suppose not much changes since I had like all honors classes and two AP courses, except for one basic typing course. Guess how I came out. Yep, all A's and a B in the typing class! What can you do? It seems that this is the way life turns out so often. Sometimes I wish I would have chosen a more challenging major for undergraduate, but as it is I spent a lot of time with friends and learned a lot about how to deal with people, what makes them tick and what they need, this of course in addition to getting more confused about what I personally need in my life. Life...I just commented the other night to a friend of mine how easy it was when we were younger, not having to think about all of these different things. There were things that needed to be done, like sleep, eat, watch TV, read, play, and play some more. Maybe that is why we men and women are so drawn toward one another, in that our relationship would give so much more meaning to our lives. When we do something simply for ourselves it quickly becomes dull, and I have so many times heard it said, as well as have experienced the power in experiencing things together, instead of simply on our own. On this note I would like to thank all of you with whom I spent time in Peru: Franny, Meg, Chris, Nate, Beth, Emily, Emily, Meg, J-dog, Nancy, Kathy, Jess, of course Connie, Kristen, everyone from the Mount Mary group; we became like a huge family. Of course with our own quarrels, as well as happy moments, all I know is that I never felt homesick in Peru, a sentiment that was quite acute during parts of my time in New York.
I miss you all, and look forward to seeing you all again. Yet I read a book recently, and I will try my best to follow the advice even as I pass it on to you. Follow your dreams, seek out the path that fulfills your hopes and dreams, and on which you would have the greatest capacity to love those around you. As much as it pains me to leave once and again, I know that eventually I will find what I need to find for myself, and then in that moment can bring that joyfully back and settle down for whatever the rest of my life will bring. This does not mean that we stop living, by any mark, but instead that we must follow our dreams to their fruition, the deepest desires of our hearts, and that then we can be content with settling down. Opportunities though, will not cease, and as soon as we are able, we may elect to leave our settled state again. But we would have already achieved our greatest goals, and so that we are not scrambling to accomplish at the end of our lives, but instead see each new day with grateful eyes and hearts, and are ever ready for the moment at which we will pass on to the next part of our existence. And having accomplished our dreams, we will already have a taste of this heaven, and so can desire it all the more strongly. And, surrounded by the fruits of our lives, we can return to our Creator with thanksgiving and joy in our hearts. God bless you, and may He aid you in all your pursuits. And may we always remember, "The glory of God is shown in man fully alive!" So conquer those misgivings and let God shine through you, and please pray that I might be enabled to do the same.
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