Perhaps....

Sometimes I like to write without a destination and see where the pen, or in this case, the keyboard leads. At times it works really well, but in others I end up running in a vicious circle in my mind that only leads the reader to discover my lunacies and regret his having come along for the trip. At this moment in time I have just finished with the last of my formal classes for the school year and I teach one final review tomorrow. After this I will have only to work on one major project for one class and touch up the work I have already completed for my other classes. I am beginning to look forward to the summer and the freedom it brings. If there is one thing that I have learned from this year, and that would be far understating the fact, it would be that I like to do things and get them done. I relish dwelling on the deeper questions in life, and I would rather get done with what needs get done in the moment in order to be able to do that. I love the rush of the summer wind over the greenest leaves that carries my mind to thoughts of God and the world beyond this life. There is so much truth that is manifested in the world outside every day. Did we catch it today? Or did we walk or run right on by to the tune of our endless chants of efficiency and hard work? Yes the latter especially is important, and the first insofar as it fits with the other elements you want present in your life. For example it would be more efficient to do everything on your own, especially if you are the most knowledgeable, but wouldn't this exclude the possibility of inviting someone else in, teaching them something new, inviting them to see the world from a different perspective. Life is too short to sit and bicker over who has more or less, or better understands the world. Sometimes I wish that this world would just be over already and we could all see the truth once and for all!

And then again...there is so much to learn, so many paths to follow, so many rabbitholes that lead to I know not where. I have boundless energy to explore this world and see where I might end up. I would love to have a job in which I can do it and get done. I love language and for this reason I might more research interpreting in the coming year. It may work out well for me in that I would have a job that begins and ends at a certain point and that is somewhat mobile, in that I could establish myself as a translator as well and then interpret once I reached my destination. So many thoughts and ideas, and I think sometimes that not being in a perfect place is better to agitate the imagination to conceive what the perfect place looks like, or its elements, or anything else that could be revealing as to the future. I have enjoyed my time here in Kent, it has not been heaven, but alas heaven is only available to us beyond death, and this is something that I do not fear, but look forward to as if it is far along the line, after I have lived all that I am meant to live here. My mother does not think I will ever settle down, perhaps she is right, perhaps I will not, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.....