What is life?

Uncertainty I daresay is my greatest nemesis. I have always desired to know for sure, ever since I was a little kid. I looked to everyone else to tell me what's right and what's wrong; good and bad. But following childhood we are thrust into a world in which we are already supposed to know these things. Even if we spent our entire childhoods following someone else's directions, now, of a sudden, we are supposed and expected to know exactly what we want to do for the rest of our lives. Fortunately the United States education system does allow some latitude for us to "figure things out," however I do not know how good this is either. All this to say that I don't know what I want to do. Life seems ever a tension between what is right in front of me and what I am supposed to be doing. Goals are good, but if your mind is limiting you to do what's "right," and you don't really know what that is, how in the world are you supposed to set goals? Yes we can work, and save and build a family, develop a life, find the love of that life, and build something greater together, and yet in all of that are we not just simply following the framework of many years past? Simply repeating history? There is nothing new under the sun, so what are we living for? Certainly not to create new things, do new things, it's all been done before. The context changes, people change, technology "improves," and yet we are just as much people as Adam and Eve and those who witnessed every epoch that life has been in existence. So what do we do with our lives? Work must definitely play a part, and allow us to live in this world, however should it be the prime focus? And what about success, wealth, fame, beauty, all of the things that so many of us spend our whole lives trying to attain. Or is life meant simply for spending, even wasting; obeying the hedonist pleasure principle that we must get all that we can with the limited time that we have. None of these do it for me. Ever before and ever anon there will be that void inside that assures me that there is something more; something greater; something that I of my own free will and volition cannot fill up, cannot satisfy, can only hope to learn more about and then allow to be filled. There are experiences in life that approximate the fullness I seek, but they are often short-lived and would coincide with events promoted by a more hedonistic, or pleasure-driven approach to life. What do I want from this life? There are few things that I want and need, and perhaps for this reason do I run so fast, and attempt to avoid the deeper questions in life. There was a time when I would have indulged myself and pondered these to the n-th degree, wondering, daydreaming, seeking, and to the end that I found some vestige of tranquility in that all things are uncertain in this life in which we live and make our existence. What are the deeper questions in life? How well can I distract myself from reality? How long till I next get drunk? How many days left until the weekend? How soon do I get to see my girlfriend/boyfriend/long-lost friend? I think that we can create our own needs, and dare I say even exaggerate them and allow them to monopolize our time and energy. I am no expert, theologian, philosopher, or genius, but I propose that some of the deeper questions in life are as follows: 1. Who am I? 2. How did I get here? 3. What is my purpose? 4. Who do I love? 5. What do I believe in? 6. What do I want to do with my gifts and talents in the short amount of time that I have been given to be a part of this world? If I can answer just a few of these questions, I will have begun to discover what it means to live!