This time of year

Graduation time. The time for the end of something long-fought and hard-earned, and the beginning of something new. New faces, new locations, new challenges and new struggles. Life is full of these it seems, and never seems to let down. This is why we have decided to do something different. I fear that life will simply lull or pound me into concession and submission. Submission to something I never necessarily asked for, and concession of all the crazy dreams and ideals of youth. So the call is to become the best version of yourself, or so the Matthew Kelly craze of late has termed it. I believe there is a lot of truth to be found in these words, and the real truth of the matter is that what it takes to become that best version of ourselves is very different for each one of us. For me, this means taking some time off with a brother and friend and attempting to travel around the world. Do you ever feel like life here in the states is conducted over some kind of safety net? That all of our risks and struggles are real, but if ever we should fall, there is always someone there to pick us back up again? Well, however unfortunately, I do not feel that this is real life. No one asked any one of us whether we wanted to be born, and the fact that we were born does not entitle us to anything. Perhaps you say it should, that every human person deserves dignity and the right to life, and I agree, and in this great country, the United States of America, these rights are often preserved. But at the same time we are sheltered and coaxed into thinking that we have it the best, and therefore why go anywhere else. That every other country in the world is essentially in disarray, and so there is no need ever to leave. That everything we here have is as it should be, and so we should not protest. Just go on about your life, get yours, and life will be fine. I hesitate, I chafe, I know there is something more and I want a piece of it. I want life to fight back, I want to have to struggle to make things work, I want a little taste of blood in my mouth every once in a while. This comfortable, established, and ordered life is certainly for some, and perhaps will better agree with me at some point as well, but not now. Now I take life by the horns and run with it, run to the far corners of the globe in exploration and expectation of finding the great truths of life hidden in some backwoods or alley gutter. I expect to find it raining in the Amazons of Brazil or in the concise steel structures of Tokyo. Life is lived by exploring new possibilities and new potentials.

The questions are asked: how much money do you have? What about all of the shots, vaccinations, visas, etc.? My answer is another question: how much does it take to travel the world? And are you going to let the little things stop you from chasing your dream?

There is the famous platitude that one should shoot for the moon, and if one fails to reach it, that person will still find themselves among the stars. This trip is not so much about the external reality, but more about what kind of changes and impacts the external reality is going to have on our souls. This trip is a journey of the soul if you will. A quest to find ourselves, with the knowledge that we will be stretched, will be challenged, will have let-downs and triumphs, and at the end that we will come out stronger people for what we have sought and achieved, whether this be an accomplished journey around the world, or simply an expedition to the West Coast and back. And so I venture to ask you:

What are your dreams? And what are you doing to make them a reality in your life?

Good Luck Fr. Dennis!

This picture encapsulates the event that brought three friends together to celebrate the life and ministry of a great man by the name of Fr. Dennis Miller. A priest at St. Thomas Aquinas Catholic Student Center since the beginning of my own time there, he has been a support and an inspiration for the family and student communities alike that together comprise the parish population. My time at Iowa State University was challenging as I was forced to confront the realities of life to which I was rarely exposed during the greater part of my life up to that point. I vaguely recall visiting St. Thomas and feeling somewhat comfortable there during one of my first campus visits to Iowa State, but of course it was also quite different from my very conservative and traditional home parish in Rockford, Illinois. Nonetheless, despite the somewhat more scarce periods of kneeling during mass, and the sung Alleluia after the Gospel reading, I adapted and came to enjoy my new experience of Catholicism. Many good friends were an invaluable support during this time, not the least of which being my high school buddy and one of my best friends of all time, Andy May. Other men and women supported me and helped me to see that despite the imperfection of the human elements of Catholicism and the issues with St. Thomas Aquinas as a parish specifically, at the heart lay the reality of an encounter with Christ, and the need to share that with every single person encountered in our lives. This is what Fr. Dennis continually communicated to me, and was one of the reasons that I stuck by the Church, and ultimately served as a leader within it, a peer minister over the course of my junior year at Iowa State.

During this time, Fr. Dennis was the voice of reason and truth, explaining the intricacies of what it takes to become a Catholic priest, and constantly sharing his experience of the faith through discussion, and his wisdom and knowledge through conversation and the passing on of books and catechisms and any resources or materials that he saw fitting to my spiritual needs at that point in time. Fr. Dennis, was, and as I realized upon seeing him this past week, still is a figure that I look up to as a friend, and as a role model. There is a sense about him that inspires some measure of awe in my heart and soul, and I think it is the beauty of his devotion to his vocation. He still never hesitates to offer a smile, and truly carries a deep sense of joy with him that proves contagious to everyone that he meets. He is both a leader and a man of the people. He has left an indelible mark on the students that he has taught and pastored at St. Thomas Aquinas, and I know will continue to do so in the six parishes of his future assignment. I pray that God bless and continue to inspire him, and that the Holy Spirit remain constantly with him that he will possess the strength of faith and passion for people to continue to provide the spiritual sustenance and intellectual challenge that the world needs.

God bless and keep you Father, and thank you for all the ways in which you have impacted my life. I would not be the man I am today without your support and teaching.

Passion

Passion drives us! It fills us and pushes us ever onward, through every trial and struggle. We need it as much it needs us to have a purpose. We feel it in the adrenaline-filled moments that define our lives, and yearn for it in the ordinariness of daily life. Yet where does it go? How in the world does it leave, and where does disembodied passion have to go? Who can it inhabit? These are things we cannot know, and yet we do know when it is there, we know when it fills us, and interestingly enough these occurrences can be pinpointed and linked to certain activities or pursuits in our lives. This is a topic I continually return to, because I feel it is so extremely critical.

Our bishop spoke this past weekend on hearing and following the call of God, and how doing so brings great peace into our lives, and that following our own will or the will of the Evil One will only bring us an ever more profound feeling of desolation. Why in the world would we seek the latter? I would posit that not only does following the will of God bring peace, it also brings passion! It brings with it the pursuit of something greater than ourselves. It is in these moments that we forget ourselves and really look to the joy of those around us that we feel this sense of peace and are filled with these feelings of passion.

I want all of you to have passion in your lives! Chase your dreams and do what you must do in your lives to feel fulfilled! Follow every possibility, pursue every opportunity and never hesitate to improve yourself and yet always look to those around you. Seek love with temperance, success with magnanimity, joy with generosity!

Intimacy

Is it wrong to want a little bit more than the typical interaction of today, where we are connected to the rest of the world through this thing that we call the internet and world wide web, and yet do not even interact with the people that we live with, and much less with the neighbor next door? What is this world coming to when families stay in touch completely digitally and do nothing to go beyond this primitive yet technologically advanced form of communication. All of these developments that happen on a daily basis, that enable each one of us to be an ever more efficient cog in the great machine of an economy like the one in the United States, and by extension a significant cog in the wheels that turn the international economy, seem to draw us farther and farther away from one another. Certainly we are all connected, but in reality we only ever get snippets of one another as we carry on with our constant work. Ironically I write this post, ostensibly hoping that someone will read it, agree with me, write me a brief comment and carry on reading and writing at the lightning pace that we now recognize to be the standard and a good one at that. How far have we come when we are judged on every single thing that we do, that our writing is our speaking, that we live by virtual example? Is this right? Can this even be possible? I used to think of my online presence as an opportunity for fun, and know that plenty of people still treat it as a means of altering themselves from what they actually are in real life, to what they truly want and dream to be online.

Perhaps I am too hasty in writing this off, but I feel that all of us truly need that interpersonal interaction that makes life worth living. Maybe this comes in the form of a spouse or children, or a community in which we live, but if we do not receive this sort of intimacy in our lives, if we do not truly experience the love that sets us apart from the animals, then we are nothing more than they are, running around on little wheels and at the end of the race still nothing more than just rats.

The web and internet that connects us can be a very good thing, as long as at the end it leads us to encounter one another more deeply and grow to understand what life is about and what we are intended to do with it. For life is too short, and nothing can replace the feeling of a hug freely given and freely received. These are the things that make life worth living and without which life becomes terribly lonely and boring. And this is something that not one of us could ever truly desire for our lives in our heart of hearts. Every day I walk around and see people thirsting for attention and a good conversation "in-person". These online chats, and email conversations are great to a point; to keep us in touch, and facilitate communication on events and happenings, but when it comes to real-life questions, how good is it? Really?

Sometimes I desire to run away from it all, from the rat race that encourages us to step on one another in order to get ahead. Every time I am presented with the opportunity my heart immediately gives way for the person that comes after. If I want something badly enough I suppose I will offer up my best effort and hope that I do come out as the selected one, but the more I live, the less I am inclined to compete in this cut-throat economy. Rather teach those who will be going out and making the decisions in this world how to form moral judgments and live lives worth living.

Intimacy is where at all starts. Something that we need throughout our lives, and if we have not found it, it is something that must be the goal of a continual search, until we reach a point that we can speak with anyone and cheer them up. A friend recently told me the story of the young man who was carrying a large load of books home from school one day, and the other young man who saw him get knocked over and ridiculed by another group of boys, and then ultimately decided to help the young man, which lead the two to become the best of friends. From here they reached high school graduation, upon which the young man who had carried the books was named valedictorian, and in making his speech to the graduating class and all present, described how on that day he had cleaned out his locker because he didn't want his mother to have to do it later as he was going home to commit suicide.

Do you think that an email or a Facebook message could have stopped him from doing this? Someone saying that they liked his status or his photo and wanted him to take some meaningless survey would have changed his mind from the act he was well on his way to committing? I don't think so. Yes all of these connections are wonderful, but at the end of the day it comes down to one-on-one interaction, conversation about anything or nothing, that keeps us living and breathing and desiring to keep living and breathing. Argue with me all you want, I will hold this point until the day I die. Life is too short to have only this "impoverished" form of communication with others. It is high time that we stood up from behind our computers and went home and told our mothers that we love them. Sit and listen to what they have to say. I hate to break it to you, but money is not all that matters in this life. Yes it is good to live well, and but how much does it take to live so, and how much of your time are you being forced to sacrifice for this good life?

Perhaps others can live the crazy life, always working, but when I look deep into their eyes and souls I sense a yearning for something more. Yes money is important and we should not forget this, but do not forget about the importance of relationships in your life, the people that are closest to you cannot be replaced and they can disappear in an instant. Facebook, email, all of the things online and internet will be there for a long time to come, but not the people who we should care about the most.

Apathy - Flojera

Is it bad to say that I don't care anymore? How can one be so motivated one day and so uninspired the next? Please don't take this the wrong way, I am fine, but simply consider the question. We here spend our lives building our resumes and impressing people, always inordinately aware of the effect that we are having on people and the subsequent impressions that they are developing about us. Certainly, in the context of this temporal world, these impressions and opinions are significant, but how come I cannot bring myself to mind? Anyone I could cite as a reference would speak well of my character and my ability to see the world so clearly, to enter into a startlingly surprising depth of relationship, however would they really be able to say that I can perform the tasks set in front of me. Perhaps I have been in this academic environment for too long and my judgement is skewed, perhaps I did not sleep well enough last night, perhaps I am sincerely losing my mind, but any of these possibilities notwithstanding, I am so uncertain, so done, so confused about where the future will lead. I am prepared to give myself to anything at this point. To whatever splashes across the radar. I am not thinking clearly at a point in time when this is exactly what is needed. How does it seem that everyone else has the shark-like tenacity and sense of focus to hone in on exactly what they are seeking and to go for it? Why is there this strong sense of confusion, and thereby this sense of apathy - flojera or laziness that overcomes my spirit and leads me to write here instead of doing what I perhaps should be doing to finish my education. How much longer will my sanity hold out? What have I come here to accomplish?

All these questions lead me to think that perhaps I need a nap. I need to work at discerning that to which I am called in this short life. In truth it is not worth it to me to work my tail off so and at the end have only a document to show. I want true progress, true change, true results that I can look back on and feel the joy of accomplishment. Even if what I create may someday be destroyed - something tangible to cling to in my world that is so often governed by the intangible. My heart cries out for life for something real, for something that cannot be quantified into anything real, that cannot be put into words but must be lived! Write I gibberish, or write I something that gets at the heart of our existence? Are we but rats or are we men? What do we here seek to achieve? To establish systems and societies that organize our lives, but dampen our spirits? My heart is not found in such things, my heart is found outside the box, at times outside myself.

For what do we need the system? For what the order and associated complications in life? I am sick of organized and logical arguments. I can feel inside the truth of what I believe and I simply want to live without being bound by the structures that surround me on all sides. Are you with me? Or does it matter? For these things get at the deepest part of me, which is unlike anyone else in this world, and perhaps only God can understand....

Overwriting

I think I am somewhat resolved to the fact that the United States' economy calls us all to this harried pace, which in many cases does not allow us to think about our lives meanwhile they fly by us, and we are left lost as to the reasons why we have chosen anything that is currently a part of our lives. Perhaps I overreact and am not thinking clearly, and perhaps I am simply lazy, and based on this last opinion I am starting to try to pick up the pace a bit. But I will say that I will never go so fast as to sacrifice who I am in favor of anything financial. Though I see that hard work does indeed pay off, I am uncertain that this is truly going to prove fulfilling for me in life. For the moment yes I need work hard and push to fulfill all the obligations put upon me, however I am not beholden to anything in this world beyond my life within it. Once this is done, no one can hold me to them, and so up to this point I have lived my life quite recklessly, but I daresay, quite daringly as well. Maybe I have a misconceived notion of daring, but I believe this is simply being willing and ready to greet whatever circumstance and to always follow your heart wherever it may lead.

I do not want the conventional life. I do not want to work forty hours a week and come home every night to my family awaiting me, or maybe I do, but not today, not tomorrow, not for a long time to come. I want the world, I want to touch the person that lives in you and call him or her out to live the life that is greater! To reach up to God in love, and then be able to reach out to one another. To change the face of this planet by your simply living inspired! You cannot be anyone other than yourself, but we all need to be inspired to do so. If your life is boring to you, change it, find a way to make it more interesting, regardless of what changes this may take. If you cannot change the big picture, alter the little things, make arrangements to do something fun every day, something that inspires you and fills you up and enables you to push on.

Perhaps I am a dreamer, and I know that I may be. But all I want from you is that you would dream too. That together we change this world to make it a place where everyone has the opportunity to achieve their dreams. Unfortunately we are right now in a great quandary. There are so many who squander the opportunities they have been given, and others who have ten times the inspiration of those who have squandered, and yet have nothing before them but poverty and endless restrictions and red tape.

What about these members of society? Do they get to dream? Let us hope that in the time to come we change our own lives and hearts so that we can dream, and so that our dreams help make it possible for others to realize their hopes and dreams. There are so many voices telling us that these things are black and white, but they are not. It takes a lifetime to come to know oneself, and around ever corner is a new opportunity to learn about ourselves and to adjust our lives to better include these so that we may live each day truly inspired and truly alive! And the bigger question, and greater difficulty is what a friend of mine once had posted on her door, that our job, our vocation, our mission, is that which lies, "where your greatest passion meets the world's greatest need". Or something to this effect...I think we have something to learn from this...

Keep living and learning and loving...together we will find our way, in the light of God's ever present, ever living Truth. Onward Christian soldiers!

Fire and Eyes

Has anyone ever asked you what you live for? Have you ever asked yourself? What is is that makes you jump out of bed every day and greet the day, eager to continue along the path that is your life? Is there anything in particular?

I live to see people come alive, to see the fire of passion for life rise inside of them and overcome them, and they are filled with joy and the inspiration to push on. When I see someone in despair it is as if my own heart sinks with them. I love when I see love, I despair when I see despair, I hope when I see hope, I can identify and empathize with any feeling. But I most love when people come alive. I have seen this in people's eyes, there are movies in which the camera zooms to the eyes as they observe the bonfire behind the camera and the reflection of the flames roil off the lens of the protagonist, however the fire burns so much brighter and truer in real life. It flows from the soul up through the corpus and into the ever-expressing, ever-observing, ever-readable eyes. The flame burns inside, and the person smiles and life is right again.

It has taken me my lifetime to figure out that I don't know exactly what makes me come alive, but I know when I feel it. Thus the importance of grasping those moments and situations in which our hearts are light and our love is true, remembering them and treasuring them and recreating them and reliving them at every possible opportunity. The road to fulfilling life begins with self-understanding. What do you enjoy? From there stem all the good things that God has in store for us in this life. For God truly wants for us what we most want in the truest part of ourselves. In being true to ourselves, to our desires, hopes, and dreams, we are being true to God. Be faithful, believe, and to thine own self be true, and you will be amazed at what you and God can do.

Blogging

I regret to say that I think I have misunderstood the concept of blogging. I initially ventured into the blogosphere as a means for expressing my thoughts for all to see and hear. At the very first I suppose this was a means for me to share with the family back home the experiences in Peru and other assorted places to which I have had the opportunity to travel over the years. I never intended to develop a readership, nor advertise on this site, nor do anything that would in any way benefit me, whether financially or in terms of self-esteem. I do not know that I went into it with the wrong ideas in my head, or whether perhaps some of the other writers in the blogosphere have it wrong. What am I to do? I wonder as to making money at a trade that consists of converting one set of words to another set of words, only that the first set is unintelligible to the readers of the second set, and vice-versa. I suppose it is only that I have a hard time financing my life with work done purely on a computer, and work whose effect I hardly ever get a chance to see. I have a high respect for the freelance translator who does nothing more than translate, and I also cannot understand sometimes how we can benefit financially from something that we compose in our minds and throw up on the internet. Should we benefit from such things? I feel at times as though everything in this world is going a hundred miles an hour and I cannot slow down to enjoy one instant of this rapidly passing time. I have these moments where I vent, center, and then move on to live life once again, but I don't know that it is possible to truly live a life of continuity that does not at some point require a stopping and a reorientation to what I want out of life.

Sometimes I pine for the simplicity of youth, for the days in which success was measured by the number of apples you could gather from the orchard, or how long you could stay in the mud-pit that you deemed a lake in the back pasture. When did life become so complicated, and why? I have been fortunate to experience many things in my young life, and I know that they are all combining to lead to a fulfilling adult life, but I cannot yet make the leap. It is as if I am stuck in neutral, and am waiting for that push that will allow the engine to start and life to continue in the way that I have both dreamed and imagined it!

Christmas is a wonderful time to be home with family and friends, and I truly cherish every moment. I wish that days could be as simple as this, and I suppose that this is always an option. To settle down right next door to mom and dad and work and live life in this way, but my heart calls me onward to something more. I yearn to return to El Salvador and Cuba and to go across the world! My heart is restless for adventures that can be neither expressed nor read in written words. I long to feel alive again, to experience fulfillment in my heart by giving to someone else on the other side of the world. By climbing that mountain, by not waiting to achieve the dreams that I have dreamed! I want to wait no longer, I need to do this. My heart is ready, and in short order so will be my circumstances.

Writing

You ever have those days when the words seem to flow in all that you do, you sit down to journal over that first cup of coffee and the words literally leap onto the page? The mind is racing so fast that neither the hand, nor the keys on the keyboard can keep up with all the things that you have to say! And then the day moves on and the ideas slow down to the pace of your hands, and then fade to the point that the mind can no longer keep up with the hands. There is this window of time, at least for me in which writing flows and goes and I do not question what I write, but later reflect on it and find insight in what I wrote. Sometimes I think it is like that comedy in which Homer gives a wonderful presentation or platform for some political campaign, wins, and then wakes up from the coma and asks what happened. Writing is sometimes like this, that you cannot control or regulate it when it comes but must allow yourself to be the lightning rod by which it flows onto the page or computer screen. I wish that so many things in life could be more explicitly explained, put into a box and sold, but this is not one of them. This is a gift from God, the ability to allow your body to be an extension of the mind that lives and breathes and contemplates within us, ever refining the thoughts that sometimes shoot out like this, that fill the page, that form the static that we must wade through every day of our lives, or the words of wisdom that free us from the chains of bondage, or enlighten us to try another way, to seek something new. Words are the most powerful instrument in the world, if they are well strung. Like a piece of music that can uplift or destroy our resolve, such power do words have as well, and I want to let them flow, want them to take on lives of their own and inspire each one of you to live to your greatest potential and to never let go of the dreams that first inspired you to do anything in this life. No dream is too crazy, we always have hope no matter how hopeless the situation may seem, and above all have no fear! BE NOT AFRAID! All fear will do is prevent us from reaching our fullest potential in this life. And each one of us can achieve so much if we just let our gifts flow and give them where they are needed. Let us use each day to help us better understand how we may take up this role in the world! And if you ever need words of inspiration, you know where to look!

End of Finals Week

Fatigue and confusion threaten to overcome me at the end of what has been a whirlwind past couple of weeks. I still have much to do, including grading the volumes of student exams that remain in my possession. After administering them this afternoon, there was both the levity of the end, and the weight of grading them that still bears on my mind. And yet I suppose that the end has come for the time in which we had opportunity to give our all, to learn, to discover and to implement the new skills we gained. Is the real world truly this way? Do we simply cram things into our minds long enough to pass an exam and then promptly forget it all? I question the nature of our education. Perhaps there are some, even many that can learn in this environment, but I find it toxic to my own learning. I learn of course, and these thoughts are by no means a reflection on the quality of my professors, whose gifts continue to impress me more by day. I am left simply reeling at the sheer volume of work that those in academia are expected to process and produce. I struggle to organize myself long enough to endure a semester. Is it the nature of this school only? Or is this the nature of academia across the country? Are all people so divorced from society and their own personal lives due to the time required to be a good professor/instructor/graduate student?

My mind is still a mess with regard to all of this, and I think it will take some time for me to get my bearings. Sleep would be a good place to start. But I simply wanted to throw out some questions at this moment. I suppose that I have benefited quite a bit from the system, which may take some of the wind from my sails, insofar as I cannot very well critique something from which I have gained so much. Education I will say and always will defend is a great opportunity, a gift that we should all treasure. For truly, our knowledge is one of those intangibles that can never be taken from us, that remains despite any action committed against our bodies or any other part of our physical reality. At the same time, are there better ways of educating ourselves?

I wonder at the difference in education across the world and the type of students and individuals created as a result. Certainly scare tactics and indoctrination are not the best course for education, however I know plenty of people, born and raised outside the United States, who know the geography of North America better than I could have ever imagined was possible for a student in the US, much less for someone from the other side of the world. What are we seeking though? Wealth? Hope for a better life? At what cost...that of someone else's poverty, or the loss of our lives and relationships because we lose that fragile balance that allows us to work hard and yet maintain friends and relationships. What is life truly about? Why are we here? Is it true that we make ourselves? And if so, how is this done?

I am intrigued as ever, by the answers that Christianity has to offer. I believe that in the absence of Christian ideals for which to strive, life offers little other than banalities to distract us from the fact that we have no direction in life. Only endless pursuits of temporal things that will not last beyond this life. What do you want your life to be for? How do you want to spend the finite amount of time you are given upon this earth, in this world, this existence in a vast, glorious and beautiful universe.

Choose wisely, and this life can be fulfilling for you and those around you. And always ask questions, for they lead us to the truth that governs all, and shows the path to true freedom, and thereby true contentment in this crazy world.

Merry Christmas! Go home and spend time with those you love. You deserve it and so do they. And thank God for all that He has given you. For no matter how little or much you have, you are blessed in that you live. In that you have the opportunity to make a difference in this world, in that your life could count for something, could mean something, could change the world. Fear not, and follow your heart, and let your life be phenomenal!

The day everything made sense...

And then...everything made sense. I understood what I needed to do to be effective in my teaching. Something clicked, by the grace of God. For the first time in a long time, I enjoyed teaching a class. I realize that the method that I had been using before had been usurping my abilities as a teacher, and that I teach better by another way. Yes there is a way that we are supposed to teach department wide, but it also requires adaptation to each individual instructor.

Most likely I am having a very good day, that will later come crashing down on me, but for the time being I am enjoying myself and look forward to a trip to the airport this afternoon. I sometimes forget how much I am impacted by the energy of those around me, and despite the fact that part of the class was boring today, I feel that the students actually grasped what in the world we were doing, for we have embarked on one of the more difficult topics - the subjunctive of the Spanish language.

Despite the fact that there are days in which I wish I had never come here, I realize that I am learning so many good things and gaining so much positive experience that will serve me well in the future, or I should say rather, will serve the path on which I am going. Thank you Lord for such a glorious day! I do not doubt that you have granted it in response to my continual prayers, and I call on you all to talk to our Lord, communicate with Him, speak to Him about your life, but more importantly listen, and He will lead you in His ways, which we cannot always understand, but will ultimately lead us to the most fulfilling lives we could possibly have on the face of this earth.

I am so inspired to write again, and I do not doubt that it is because I have made the Lord a priority once again in my life. God is great, all the time, and we all need to remember this always, for in giving him the appropriate praise and thanksgiving, He will return to us a million-fold. Have faith, the Lord is with you.

Retreat

Retreat literally means to get away, to seclude ourselves, and in our sense of the term here, it means to do so with a group of people, centering ourselves around a deeper understanding of the Truth that flows from God. And this is what we did this past weekend, making prayer, or communication with our Lord, the focus of our efforts. The introduction to and practice of new prayer forms did much for my understanding of what prayer is, but more importantly I learned the significance of and need for emphasis that we need to put on prayer in our lives. Everything we do, consider, discuss, should stem from our prayer lives. As true Christians and followers of God, nothing should stem from our own self-controlling will, but rather work in cooperation with what God is showing us in our lives; ever informed by our lives of prayer.

I cannot stress how important prayer is to all of our decisions and to our ultimate discovery of happiness, or our falling into despair. It is amazing how the practices that do not necessarily work against God, but do nothing positive for our bodies and persons lead us steadily away from what it means to be a true follower of Christ. Nothing should ever stand between us and our seeking this relationship. It should not matter where we are or what we have to accomplish, this always has to take priority, and I think that letting go of our ideas of controlling our lives is an important step in this process. If not we are likely to take the position that we here in the States so often do: "I don't have time!" Make time! For if we do not make time for God, neither are we making time for ourselves. For only God can know what will fulfill us in this life, even as much as we think we ourselves know how it should be. We do not!

This does not mean that we sit down on the ground and say, "God tell me what to do with my life!" No, rather it means that we develop our prayer lives and hence our relationship to Him, we set aside time by going to Mass or church service and grow our knowledge and understanding of him through discussion, Bible study, and catechism. Then we live our lives, following our hearts and our informed consciences, and the eternal spirit that lives within us will guide us in the ways of God, because our person has been filled up and informed on God, and the eternal spirit that lives within us can work in harmony with the body, heart, and mind that make up the rest of our personhood.

God is great, and gives us so many good things and so many clear signs. It is certainly high time that I accept what He has called me to in my own life, surrendering my will to His, in the knowledge that He knows the desires of my heart, and that my heart, my mind, my entire person, will not rest until it rests in Him.

I pray that you would all open your lives to the Word of God, and the words God has to share with you in prayer. Be always willing to serve Him, no matter what He calls you to. For we cannot know where to find joy, other than in Him, and if we take joy in seeking to follow Him, it will not matter what we do, for we will have Him always to sustain us and bring fulfillment to our lives!

Finding the way...

It's been a while since I have offered a reflection or an insight into my life on this forum, or I guess I should say on this online journal. There has not been time, nor inspiration lately. Yet I must admit that I have not been completely faithful to the things in my life that are of the greatest importance, and for that I am deeply sorry. Put the Lord first and the rest will fall into place. So I have learned over this past week.

There are always frustrations in grad school, but I have felt especially frustrated, especially "lost" in translation; however I have learned again, as our Lord has always so subtly and yet clearly reminded me, of the importance of prayer. Prayer has a centering effect, the action draws you to engage the Lord in relationship, to share with Him the deepest thoughts that have entered your mind, and upon leaving to realize that everything you do is for Him. This takes the pressure off, for the Lord wants us to do our best, but we know that He will love us regardless of the outcome. Should we find success, we know that He will be right there with us, joyful in our joy. Should we fall, he will be right there beside us, consoling and inspiring to get back up and try again.

It is easy to let things get out of perspective in this hectic life. Sometimes I wish I had more of an imposition of the contemplative life, but without our own decision-making, one does not just end up with a deep, contemplative life. It is practice and surrender, opening one's heart and mind to the Lord and not being afraid of what will come. Fear as I have reflected on many times is the paralysis of the human person; Pope John Paul II repeated the words of Jesus over and over to the world, "Be not afraid". Be not afraid because you can, be not afraid because you cannot, be not afraid because you will, be not afraid because you will not.

I have always loved the quote, "I can do all things through Him who gives me strength". And it is so true. I can endure translation. I can speak to the world, to students, parishioners, and Catholics alike, about prayer, life, hope, patience, love, and peace. For through the Lord's help I have come to experience them in my own life, and now I am charged with the privilege of sharing this with others. All who hear and heed the call of God are called to this mission. Let us go, without fear, and do God's work, in this world who so desperately needs what He has to give to those who come to Him.

Lost in translation

For a while I thought that the above was only the title of a confusing and not very enjoyable movie starring Bill Murray, then in studying the topic here at Kent State I realize how much truth is contained in the maxim, but never did I think that the phrase would apply to my own life. Everything I have ever known has changed, and I often think it is for the better, but life is one of those things whose progress we cannot well evaluate when we are in the middle of it. Here in Kent there are so many opportunities, and yet I only feel driven to pursue very few. The classes are interesting, but not inspiring; the inspiration comes when the tools are used to communicate with those Spanish-speakers that I encounter: at the clinic, at the church, in El Salvador, and in Cuba. Life is too short I believe to spend all of our lives working, and perhaps this is why I so much struggle with my stay here. I know that I am learning, but in a way that I would prefer not to learn, in a way that is comparable to shoving food down the throat as opposed to enjoying its flavor and consistency as it falls and fulfills the cravings of the stomach.

One can say that it is only two years, but when you're twenty-four, this is a life-time. It is one-twelfth of my existence, one-twelfth that will surely help me in the future, but one-twelfth that I will struggle through while I am here. I want only to find peace, to find my place and learn where I need go to bring faith, hope, and love to the world. Language is important, but here we learn not even that. We learn systems to categorize our languages, software to capture and alter them, strategies to tear them apart and build them back up again. Granted this is not true for all, but it is one way of looking at translation. My mind falls back on the idea of "traduttore, tradittore" and as with most things, there is a degree of truth in this. What are we as translators? We do perform our own work, use our own strategies, but only based on the work of others. We are a third-party in the act of communication, rarely formulating our own message, but instead ensuring the accurate transmission of someone else's words.

I do not mean to denounce the profession, for I think it in many ways noble, I only offer these perspectives in order that someone else might share their somewhat different way of viewing what I have here described. This for me is a breaking out of my months of silence to express myself once again. I hope that this can be a forum in which we discuss our differing views of the world and thereby gain insight into what we are called to do in it.

For right now, I can only describe myself as lost in translation....

Kent, OH

It is somewhat strange to be back in Kent, OH. There is so much the same, and yet everything different. In some ways I want it back the way it was, with all the people who were once here, living in the place where I lived before; but things have changed, and I am excited for what the future will bring. There is always some level of apprehension when starting something again anew. I felt it every time I started another year at Iowa State, and it comes to me again. It is always most acute when we separate from those dearest to us, and for me that took place this morning in parting with my father who made the long trip back to Illinois. There is something to be discovered inside of us when we consider how we react to situations such as these. I tend to have intense feelings of excitement, accompanied by intense feelings of loneliness. It is dangerous and somewhat scary to cast off on your own, and thanks be to God, this time I am not alone, since I have good friends here to spend time with, and let the pangs of homesickness and longing for the past subside. And I guess there is something to brutal honesty for me when it comes to these things. Instead of keeping it all pent up inside, I would rather that the whole world knew that I am struggling inside, struggling perhaps with some of the same things that you endure in your own life, but that the world tells us must be extracted from our souls. Cut out until we feel no pain anymore and can adapt to any change as if it were nothing.

The unknown always tends to bring apprehension, and this move back to Kent is no exception. There are a lot of known factors here, but not all, as this year could bring just about anything. But along with the apprehension there is joy that this inspires as well. Joy at knowing that this year could bring a new discovery, a new journey, a new friend, a deepening of an old friendship. I am excited about my new roommate who returns from his summer tour of Germany and Italy. I am excited about having my own apartment, my own place in the world. I am excited for all the new adventures that this new year could bring with the Church, the graduate student senate, teaching, learning, refereeing, conferences, interpreting, and all the other things that this new year will entail.

Just like anyone else, I sometimes find myself longing for the past, but push forward to a future that I know will turn just as it is supposed to. There is always hope. For we have our Lord to show us the way to His Truth. And this is especially good because there is as currently no electricity in my apartment because I forgot to call and have it changed to my name! Oh well! C'est la vie! I love you all and want you to know that I care for you deeply and thank you for all that you have contributed to my life. Without you I would not be where I am today. I would not be asking the questions I am asking, and seeking the way that I know I will find to the fulfillment of my life. Live greater, it is our calling...

Friendship

If I have not written an entry under this title already, it has fallen under some other classification. I thank God every day for the friends that I have, and for the quality of my friendships. Friends truly help us through every trial, every difficult moment, and are always there to share the joys that may come in our lives. The Lord is to be thanked for every friend who has the patience to sit and try to understand what we are going through in our lives, and to help us to see the truth that lies at the heart of every situation in which we struggle. Without my friends, I would not be the person I am today, and tonight I was so fortunate to get to spend time with a good number of them all at once. Mike has been a great friend and inspiration to me, and he hosted a gathering of old friends and new, ones who have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember, and others that I am only beginning to come to know. There is something to levels in our relationships, and God has given each of us the ability to relate on so many different levels. Everyone can meet us at a different level, and I assure you that satisfaction, joy, and freedom are to be found in seeking that person with which you can share all things without ever feeling that you somehow need to hold back. Seek out that friend, and probe them, ask them questions, challenge them, and if they can take everything that you dish out, treasure them, stay in touch, always make the effort, for they have shown that they are willing to do as much for you. They will help guide you through the dark alleys of your life, which are sure to come. We are but sinners, and each one of us is destined to fall at some point. But there is always good in every situation, and your friends are the ones who will help you to find the good, to see the truth, and to work your way onward in life.

Sometimes these things are hard to put into words, but there are people who will see you better than others. Perhaps you will find this among your family members, perhaps among old friends in whom you never recognized it before, or even in new people that you happen upon in the journey of life. Be always open to these relationships and God will show you much more than you ever could have imagined possible in your life. Yes it is possible to control this, to constrain your friend base to only those you think you like, or with whom you think you share interests, but sometimes the best of friends are found in the most unlikely of places. Remember that your oldest friends may see you the best, but that new ones also have insights that the old ones could never recognize in you. Be open to any new path that opens to you, and your life can take extraordinary new directions that will teach you new things you never expected to learn, but that will somehow play a part in the journey that you lead in this life. Life is about asking questions, always seeking, always pushing the envelope to find those things in life that make us come alive, that make our lives worth living, that at the very least make us want to get out of bed in the morning and live the wonderful gift of life that we have each been given.

My friends are what so often do this for me. I have come to realize that my life is based on my relationships, and I could not ask for better friends than the good Lord has granted me along the way. We work so well together, and I never planned it a bit. Look deeply into the people that surround you, and thank the Lord for what He has given you.

I want to thank Andy and Lindsey, Mike, Jenna, my brothers and father, my mother, and all others of you, you know who you are, who have helped and continue to help me along the way. I could not have made it this far without you, and you are a part of every single stage in my life, and I hope that I share similarly in the lives that you lead. Know that no matter how long it takes for us to get in touch, when we do the Lord will let the love that we share shine between us, and the glory of friendship be rekindled again. We each must seek out our own path, but if ever we get lonely, we have only to turn back to those we love to realize just how blessed we truly are. Thank you to those I have mentioned to all of you who have so touched me in my short life. I hope to thank all of you again in person each time that we have the chance to see each other again. Until then, may God bless and keep you, and hold you in the palm of His hand.

Time passes by....

I had the stunning realization today, that by December I will have gone half the distance between 20 and 30 years old. I remember when 30 was an age that I could never fathom turning, and now I come to see myself in a new light. I have been given many gifts and I could have easily followed any number of roads with fixed destinations, but I have wanted none of these. Now as I approach what some may consider "middle-age" (perhaps I exaggerate) I have to face the fact that I am not as young as I once was, and my age will catch up with my idealism at some point. Do not get me wrong, I would never choose to go back, and I am still capable of quite a lot in my time on this earth, that is as long as the good Lord allows me to dwell here, but I am beginning to realize my mortality and the coming of age in a very real way, and want to be ready for each time as it comes.

Up to today, I have lived life somewhat recklessly, with no consideration sometimes for the path of havoc and craziness that I leave behind, but today, I realize that it is important to invest along the way. We truly need one another, for if we find ourselves alone and unhappy at the end of all this, what have our lives been for? Still, although we are beckoned in to the secure jobs that offer insurance, health-care, retirement funds, and sick leave, what if we don't? What if we say no? What if we choose to live differently, and seek out what lies in our hearts and attempt to realize it in our lives? However this does not remove us from the need that we have to stay in touch, to reach out to those closest to us, and to all others that we encounter along the way in love and thanksgiving. God is very good in the life that He allows us the opportunity to live, but it is short, and we truly do have very little time to share the love and the riches of the lives that we possess. Would that we would all have the courage to live an examined life, seeking what lies in the depths of our hearts, and go after it with all our might! For if we do not, life may run its course and we will find ourselves forever lodged in a moment of silent desperation. Let us live freely, according to the rule that "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul, and body, and love your neighbor as yourself!" God bless and keep you all.

So....I'm getting better I think....

This blog began as a means for me to share my thoughts with the world, but the goal was really to lay them out there so that I could get a better grasp of what was going on inside me head, and since I have very few things that I hold in private, I place it out there such that you who read this may benefit from my introspection. Of late I have realized the true power of a blog, and the impact that our writing can have on one another. Unfortunately writing comes cheap in our day and age, and true, quality reflections are often hard to come by, but I do not intend to offer those here. They may come, and what I write may provide some good food for thought, but this is not so much an inspirational blog as it is an attempt to take a look at reality and learn from it. If my thoughts on my own life encourage you to take a deeper look inside yourself, and into your own life, then it has succeeded in what it is capable of doing for you. Over the years this blog has taken on many different roles such as a means of reporting on abroad experiences, a vent for my thoughts, a report on events in my life, and now a means for keeping up on my own inner life, and for others to keep up on me. It is interesting how the roles change over time, and I pray that the words that I write continue to inspire you as well as fulfill the different roles that it has to play now.

Today was a good day, an opportunity to reconnect with an old friend from the church where I served as a peer minister in Ames, as well as her husband who participated in an ultimate frisbee tournament. I sat and watched and learned much about the way a professional tournament is regulated, and on what rules it operates. It was also interesting to meet up with an old friend from Iowa State later on and show her around my hometown, which is now to be her place of residence meanwhile she works in Belvidere. It was also very good to catch up with several people at the local Festa Italiana, where many Boylan grads and alums gather to celebrate their Italian heritage. I am very grateful to one young lady in particular who helped me show my ISU friend around town, and with whom I shared a very solid conversation about how to go about choosing our vocation in life.

It was interesting to note how all things are interconnected at some point. We like to think that going to the other side of the world somehow sets us apart and makes us special, but in the end someone else has gone more frequently, done more while there, etc. This life cannot be measured in terms of accomplishments, but rather by the depth of the relationships that we share. So spend time with the ones you love, the other things will get done in their own time. As much as you can, focus on that which is most important in this life, for these are the things that allow you to live on beyond the grave. People will remember you for who you were, not for the amount of money you made, or how popular or how powerful you were. Live like you were dying. And love the life you live!!!

Bike Trip to Lake Mills, WI

Several miles and many acquaintances later, we made it. The truth is that it could not have been done without the invaluable help of all the people I met. My trip acquaintances started off with a friendly old man at Macktown Forest Preserve who assured me that there was no way across the Rock river within the park, since I had intended to bike the path that went through the heart of the green golf-course. I thanked him for his offer to tour the old buildings set back from the golf course and carried on to the bridge under construction and Rockton, IL beyond. The edge of town brought the Dollar Store and a somewhat delayed purchase of a new journal and the road to South Beloit, IL, which was again a positive experience.

St. Peter's Church left two doors open, so I walked in one and had the experience that God was calling me there. I felt extremely at peace in the church that I would not hesitate to call a chapel due to its small size. Kneeling on the marble and contemplating Jesus brutalized on the crucifix before me I realized that many of the actions I have taken in my life only served to deepen the wounds of Christ. From one to whom He has given so much, He has also taken a lot of grief. But I am learning and I look forward to what the future will hold. With a few minor changes all will be most well, and I can move on to the next of my ex-ventures.

I think the ride today really helped open my mind back up to the possibilities and my mind goes wild! I thought of Colorado and my friend's graduation, and biking and skiing out there; buying a house with a lot of land, which always increases in value, and mowing it to my heart's content; shooting at a range and learning to rope and ride like a cowboy. Biking cross-country or cross-world. All things are possible with God!

On to more acquaintances, there were the two men who used to play hooky at the high school overlooking the river in Beloit, WI and now go fishing in the pond on the other side. The rest of the beautiful river walk in Beloit and Highway 51, which took me to the gas station where a boy gave me garbage-bag to protect my pack from the rain that really never came. Oh well...

Then there was Philhower Road and the shooting range. Then peaceful Read Road lead me into Janesville. The entrance was a bit confusing as Read Road turned into Sharon Road and made all sorts of twists and turns past abandoned semi's and factories and old, seemingly inhabited houses with no one around. Then came Palmer Road and the beauty of the Janesville golf course, the park, the wading pool, and concession stand. It was here that I stopped and lunched on trail mix and water, and instead of journaling spoke with Paul and Kelly. Paul gave me all sorts of ideas for authors to read and TV shows to watch to catch up on people who have done amazing things around the globe. I look forward to trying them all. Next came Bobby’s generosity with a bit of concession stand tap water and onward.

Palmer led to Wright Rd. and the “Ice Age” bike trail. Being an aficionado of woolly mammoths I indulged and ended up lost north of Highway 14. Thanks to what was apparently a college girl taking her mother on a bike ride, I regained my bearings and promptly threw them away as I did not want to backtrack. This led to a portage of what under rainy conditions would have been very muddy land, but the rain did not start until I reached Town Line Rd. and headed north. I rode north for a while, enjoying the solitude and bucolic landscape, that is until I heard the voices. Since I was lost, as I usually am when I hear the voices, I decided to stop and ask for directions. As it turned out the neighbor Gary was as good at picking up sticks near the front of a vast property belonging to the “K” family, as Mrs. “K” was at her directions. She and Gary traded off directing me to the bikepath that parallels Highway 26, as the daughter continued staring bewildered at me. I was off. Neither she nor their golden lab ever said a word.

Subsequent events lengthened my journey for quite a bit as I went west in trying to avoid riding on the shoulder of Highway 26. I took the highway as far as Milton and then got the bright idea that I could catch the bike trail that runs along Lake Koshkonong, even farther west as had been indicated on the Wisconsin county bike trail map. I never made it to find out, but Highway 59 led to John Paul Rd. (it’s good to be Catholic!) and then on to the “Rustic Rd.” It had no other name, nor did the man pursuing his boxer in a BMW call it by anything other than “that road” in his recommendation to follow it. Rustic Rd. was scenic, and alongside of which I caught inspiration to someday purchase a large expanse of property with a small house, that I could mow and fix up to my heart’s content, and then someday sell for profit. Down the road I frightened some horses as I pedaled by, apparently they don’t see too many bikers. Rustic Rd. led to County Highway N and a phone call from a friend. By the time I took it I was on the corner of Highway 26 again, having accepted the fact that I would have to ride the busy highway after all.

Not too far along however the bike trail head appeared, and about a mile down it I took the second and final call of the day from my father. Dinner, he said, but as I did not plan to reach my destination for another two hours, I put the though of food out of my head. It should be here noted that the last time I attempted a no-handed, helmet-less phone call on this very bike, I ended up over the handlebars in a heap as my co-worker pulled up behind me and began the gentle jabbing that I did not hear the end of for the rest of the summer. Adequately prepared as I was, I took both calls flat-footed, with bike helmet secured and kickstand down. I was not taking any chances.

The trail was fun and later paved, and so all was good until it went in the wrong direction. As I headed south I contemplated how I would scale the six-foot-high, barbed-wire-topped fence, and the fact that it was probably there for a reason. Eventually the trail turned the right way and Nate the biker-pro informed that it would reach Fort Atkinson. He also had some suggestions for a scenic route to Lake Mills, but as I eased my bruised caboose onto the seat that was probably manufactured in some quarry somewhere, I decided that I would probably take the shortest route up Highway 89 N, though perhaps I was wrong again as this route took me a significant distance west. The first wrong decision came as I debated taking Nate’s route and then at the last second got back on what I thought was Highway 89. It was, but I had to stop about a mile down the road, eat some trail mix, and then backtrack to town to confirm that it was.

The pain by this time was acute, and the route, uphill. However with a few Hail Mary’s and a couple of Our Father’s, I rolled into Lake Mills at 19:45, exactly eight hours from the time I pulled out of my alley in Rockford, IL. And on the note of Rockford, my thanks are due to the man at Park Rentals (so I should say Loves Park) for the allan wrench that hoisted my sidebars, which I intended to rest on, but only succeeded in providing poor steering ability and an awkward riding position. I remain grateful however, because at the end I made it and my mother and brother Daniel were good enough to pick up yogurt and fruit, and this mixed with granola hit the spot. The night was spent in good conversation, over the phone with a couple of friends, and otherwise with my aunt and my family. It’s good to be back in Lake Mills! Oh and Mike thanks for the honey whiskey, it made a great nightcap. Mass at 8am so I am off to sleep. Sweet dreams and may the Lord protect and keep you all! HIAL ITIY

A couple of notes: this time I used spell-check so I hope that the grammar and spelling is a bit better as this is one of my longer posts; photos are to come in installment two including the bike ride home to Rockford. This one should be more reflective on the experience as opposed to so focused on the individual experiences. Cheers!

A Child-Like Blog

When it comes to blogging I have always operated on the principle that if I don't write and publish it now, it will never get published. I am amazed by those of you who have the patience to write drafts, edit them, and then later publish them in their polished form, drawing a wider readership and generating a more interesting blog. I am trying to change, but do not yet know if this is what I want my blog to be. Many thoughts have crossed my mind lately, and honestly the things that I can see more concretely in day-to-day life take precedent over anything digital. This is why I still write checks, why I enjoy basketball officiating, why I go running and made the 70-mile bike trip two days ago (updates still to come, I am also lazy when it comes to these things). And I guess it was this need for visible accomplishment that sent Mike and me to Iowa to pollinate corn. There is something satisfying in spending your day working on something concrete and tactile, and to at the end of the day be able to look back at your progress and feel satisfaction at what you have accomplished. Digital technology provides little of this, though there are some small points of satisfaction when someone writes me that something I wrote on my blog struck them, and caused them to think in a different way, but I have a hard time disciplining myself to adhere to the blog and create any sort of schedule or order to my posts. I first created this as a creative outlet, and this blog will always be just that, "the thoughts of a simple Catholic man."

I would like to expand though and ask the question whether there is something to be learned from approaching all of life this way. First of all is it possible to approach every day as a child, to see everything as if you are seeing it for the first time with all the amazement and learning that comes with it? Can we approach deadlines as we used to approach dinner-time, as a point at which we need to go if we want to eat, but do not have to go if we do not want to eat what is offered? How much do we hold ourselves down to standards and rules that someone else created and assures us will bring us the most success? I remember translating a story in which Miguel de Unamuno states that success in this world is the man who best grovels in the dirt, and pays homage to the powers in the world that be. But I see a different way. John Francis, author of Planetwalker, a book (http://www.amazon.com/Planetwalker-Change-Your-World-Step/dp/0976019205) and a non-governmental organization for environmental awareness (http://www.planetwalker.org/) one day decided that he was not going to ride in any form of motorized transportation anymore. Twenty years later he is known nationwide and is a recognized advocate on the environment, having worked with the US Coast Guard and the UN, and it all began with the simple choice to walk anywhere he needed to go. Oh and another thing, he did not talk for seventeen years either. But he survived somehow.

I think that we are capable of much more in this life than we have ever imagined, and perhaps we need to embrace the imagination of a child to reach the outer limits of possibility. Anything is possible, and in my mind every boundary should be tested, every question asked, and every rule or regulation brought under examination, for I believe we too often live beneath standards that are not of our own making and serve only to extinguish the flame of life that is inherent in every one of us. This is not to say that we should all stop talking and start walking everywhere. Each one of us must find what the child inside each of us desires, and perhaps our answers will lead us right back to where we are, and we can thank God that we are indeed where we want to be. If not however, as long as your responsibilities are covered and your dependents provided for, dream big, cast far and wide. Run toward your setting sun and chase your dreams beyond the rainbow. For our time is short and no man wants to live the life of quiet desperation. Let us seek the life we yearn for in the deepest, most imaginative part of us. Let us tap the dreams of our childhood for our passions and follow them. For these are what transform our lives into meaningful stories that change the world. We cannot start out seeking to change the world, as John Francis has illustrated by his simple decision turned world-movement, but we can only follow the spark of inspiration that lies inside each one of us until it becomes a signal fire to all others, so that we all together may lead glorious and fulfilling lives!

Thank you to John, to my good friends Jane and Peter, who have specifically inspired the words of this post. And thank you to all of you who have inspired me every day of my life, and at all difficult points in between. May God bless and keep you all, and continue to inspire you to live the dreams that lie inside you.

"Make a commitment to make the journey. Each one of us has that inside of us." --John Francis (30 Minutes interview)